You Shall Choose Life
I was once receiving the public in the building of our institutions in France. A man wished to enter my room. This man had married out and cut off all connection with Judaism. I asked him to wait until I called him in.
I had ulterior motives for keeping him waiting. I hoped he would be impressed by the back-and-forth taking place in the Beit Hamidrash. I wanted the sound of Torah to awaken him from his stupor. I prayed that he would be inspired to change his ways.
When he finally did enter my room, there was a noticeable difference in his attitude. It seemed as though my prayers were answered. He told me, most enthusiastically, “Honored Rav, I never had such an uplifting experience in my entire life! I never saw such young men sitting together, completely engrossed in Torah studies. They learn with such eagerness, and their faces shine with an ethereal glow. I am truly moved by this spectacle.”
I expected this man to make some positive changes in his life. But, regrettably, as soon as he walked out of my room, he removed his kippah. As he placed it in his pocket, he stored away all of the excitement of just a short while ago and returned to his former lifestyle.
This astounded me. How could such fiery enthusiasm turn cold, without leaving any lasting impression? How could he ignore the excitement of a few minutes ago and go back to life as usual, as though nothing had transpired?
I finally realized that this man was not interested in investing the effort it took to make a real change in his life.
In a moment of inspiration, he had recognized the beauty of Torah. He was faced with a difficult dilemma. He wavered between embracing the intense regimen of the Torah Jew, as opposed to continuing the light-hearted lifestyle he had enjoyed until that moment. His Yetzer Hara got the better of him, claiming, “This is not for you. The yeshiva boys might manage it, but you are used to a life of ease. What do you need this for? It will take too much effort to change yourself at this point. Leave it.” The fire of his enthusiasm could not consume the murmurings of his inclination.
In direct contrast to this man was Yitro, about whom the Torah says (Shemot 18:1), “Yitro, the minister of Midian… heard everything that Hashem did to Moshe and to Yisrael, His people – that Hashem had taken Yisrael out of Egypt.” Rashi explains that Yitro had heard about the Splitting of the Sea and the miracles of the battle with Amalek, and he decided to join Bnei Yisrael. He was so impressed by what he had heard that he chose to abandon his service of idols, along with all of the glory that was his as the minister of Midian. He subordinated himself, instead, to the Kingdom of Hashem.
A person who merits siyata di’Shemaya to experience a spiritual stirring must grasp the moment and put it to positive use. He should immediately begin to learn Torah, or resolve to do so. As long as his heart is warm with the fire of enthusiasm, he has the ability to make a turnaround. As Tehillim (34:9) states, “Contemplate and see that Hashem is good; praiseworthy is the man who takes refuge in Him.”
But one who does not fan the flame of excitement in Torah study will be left with its dying embers. Unfortunately, incidents of this sort happen daily.
