Fleeing from Foreign Friendships

On a visit to Eretz Yisrael, a woman came to me, sobbing hysterically. Her terrible tale told of a daughter who had become friendly with a Romanian worker. She wished to marry him. Since her mother opposed this, they had decided to travel to Romania and marry there.

“I raised my daughter on sound Torah doctrine for eighteen years,” the woman wailed. “And now all my hard work is going down the drain. What is my life worth if this is what my daughter is doing to me? Can it really be that my daughter would betray her people by marrying out?

“Honored Rav, today is the day they set for flying off to Romania. Please, I ask of you, save my daughter from such a rash act!”

I was deeply pained at hearing her terrible tale. I calmed her down by saying, “Do not worry. Wait outside. B’ezrat Hashem, in the merit of my holy ancestors, your daughter will arrive here in a few minutes to take her leave of you. Bring her in to my office immediately, without waiting in line.”

The woman was confused for a moment. Her daughter was now on her way to the airport with her gentile boyfriend. How could she suddenly appear here? But the woman did as I asked and waited for her daughter to appear. And appear she did. After approximately twenty minutes, who should stand before her, but her daughter! After overcoming her initial shock, the woman asked her daughter, “How did you get here? What made you decide to see the Rav?”

“I am on my way to the airport. I wanted to say good-bye to you before leaving the country. But I couldn’t find you at home. Father gave me this address.”

“Good for you,” said her relieved mother. “Just step inside the Rav’s room with me in order to receive his blessing. Then you can be on your way.”

To her credit, the girl obeyed. As soon as they walked in, I asked the girl, “Are you Jewish?”

“Certainly,” was her immediate response.

“Then you must know that with the act that you are about to do, you are cutting off all ties with Judaism. You are no longer the daughter of Sarah, Rivka, Rachel, and Leah, our holy Matriarchs. Who knows if your children will not grow up as anti-Semites?

“Moreover, your Romanian boyfriend certainly has a Romanian girlfriend waiting for him back home. He surely prefers her, a co-religionist, over you, a Jewess. Do you know what he will do to you after you are married? He will treat you like a slave woman! He will denigrate and degrade you without end! Your life will be one account of untold misery and suffering!”

Then I roundly rebuked her for the awful thing she was planning to do in renouncing her nation and her Torah. I repeated my warning, loud and clear, “If you marry this man, your end will be bitter! Your disloyalty to Hashem will result in terrible punishment!”

I tried my best and beyond, to dissuade her from taking the fateful step of boarding the plane to Romania. B’chasdei Hashem, the girl regretted her decision. She asked for advice as to how to extricate herself from the mess in which she was enmeshed.

“Completely cut off all ties with your non-Jewish boyfriend! Do not meet with him and do not speak with him! He will fly home alone. You should enroll in a Torah institution for ba’alot teshuvah in Yerushalayim. B’ezrat Hashem, in the very near future, you will marry an upright Jewish boy. But you must promise me to sever all contact with this Romanian. Trust in Hashem, and He will work wonders on your behalf.”

The girl did as I ordered. She enrolled in a school in Yerushalayim and ascended the ladder of Torah and yirat Shamayim. At the right time, she found her true life partner.