Training Oneself to Think Correctly
While I was making my way from Lyon to Paris on behalf of meetings for our institutions, the train suddenly came to a screeching halt and remained rooted to its spot. I was in the midst of writing an essay regarding the righteousness of Sara Imeinu. Throughout her life, she constantly demanded more of herself in order to advance in Avodat Hashem.
These were my words:
I am sitting on a train, traveling from Lyon to Paris, capital city of France. I am on my way to two critical meetings on behalf of our holy institutions in Lyon. The train has come to a sudden halt, due to some trouble, and has been standing still for a full hour. The meetings will surely be cancelled. This will pose a great challenge to me. I feel that I must strengthen myself with bitachon, trusting that Hashem is the ultimate Stationmaster.
But my Yetzer Hara keeps niggling at me. You put so much effort into traveling from Lyon to Paris, he claims. The month is drawing to an end; how will you manage to pay the avrechim their monthly stipend? What a shame so much time is being wasted here on this train! These types of thoughts hurtle through my mind. I need reinforcement in my bitachon in order to counteract these voices of the Yetzer Hara. I must believe without any doubt that Hashem has His ways and means of sending salvation and blessing upon a person.
The entire matter is in my hands. If there is a dearth of funds in the yeshiva coffers, it is due to a lack of emunah and bitachon on my part. I must increase my level of faith, filling myself to capacity with this quality. The train’s sudden halt for such a stretch is in order to bring me to stop in my tracks and re-assess my spiritual level, garnering reserves of faith to reach greater heights.
Sara Imeinu never allowed herself a moment’s rest. Not when she was a girl of seven, a woman of twenty, or a matriarch of one hundred. She always pushed herself to discover new strengths with which to serve Hashem on a higher level. She conducted herself according to the ways mentioned above. All of her years were equal in perfection, for she constantly set her sights higher, employing the eagerness of youth even in her old age.
May Hashem grant us the help to do His will with willingness and alacrity, each person according to his abilities, Amen.
After writing these words, the train continued on its way. Whether or not the meetings would transpire was in His hands alone. We may not wonder about the ways of Hashem. Everything that happens is a challenge, placed exactly where and when we need it. Our job is to overcome it.
