Proud Beginnings, Humble Endings
When we learned in yeshiva as young students, we would argue on Torah topics until one of us could prove to the others that he was right. We relished these arguments, becoming deeply embroiled in them. Each of us would stretch his mind to the limit in order to understand the words of the Gemara, so that he could be the one who would elucidate it before all the others.
But sometimes, we would reach a stalemate. No one was ready to give up his stand on understanding the sugya. At times as these, we would turn to our great teacher, Rabbi Chaim Shmuel Lopian, zt”l, to ask his opinion.
Whenever we presented him with our questions, we felt they were very complicated. But, to our complete surprise, time and again, the Rosh Yeshiva would tell us to carefully read the words of Rashi or another commentator. We would humbly admit that our difficulty was not difficult at all. We felt foolish at having disturbed our teacher over nothing.
Many years have passed since those days. My mind has become more settled. As I contemplate that period of my life, I ask myself, “Why, when we appeared before the Rosh Yeshiva, did our question seem so pressing, but after only a few moments of perusing a commentary, our question evaporated into thin air?”
When we would argue over the meaning of the words of Torah, our arguments were not altruistic. We weren’t trying to get to the root of the matter. Instead, we were enrooted in our own pride. As we presented our cases to each other, we became more and more entangled in self-righteousness, motivated by no other factor than proving that the truth lay with us. But when we decided to put aside our pride and approach the Rosh Yeshiva in order to know the real truth, our questions disappeared. We saw the light of truth between the branches of arrogance. Once pride is pruned away, all doubt falls to the wayside, and the pure truth can shine forth.
