Fear of Heaven Is in Man’s Control
A woman, pained by her son’s difficult illness, approached me, asking that I pray for Heavenly mercy in the merit of my fathers, zy”a. She added that she was especially fond of her son and was concerned for his welfare, even though he was married to a gentile woman, rachmana litzlan.
Upon hearing her words, a tremor passed through me. I explained to her the terrible prohibition of intermarriage. But she calmly responded, “What can I do? Hashem decreed that my son should be married to a gentile.”
I rebuked her for her warped way of thinking. “How could you even entertain such a thought?” I asked her, incredulously. “Hashem gave us the Torah of truth and wrote clearly there that one may not intermingle with the nations of the world, as the pesukim state (Vayikra 20:23), ‘Do not follow the traditions of the nation,’ and (Shemot 23:24), ‘Do not act according to their practices.’ Regarding the seven nations that inhabited the Land when Bnei Yisrael conquered it, we are warned (Devarim 7:3), ‘You shall not intermarry with them.’ How do you have the audacity to claim that it was Heavenly-ordained that your son should marry a gentile?!”
Every Jew has free choice. He can choose to follow the dictates of the Torah, or to ignore them. He can decide whether to go to questionable places and participate in dubious activities, or to steer clear from them.
Our Sages state (Berachot 33), “Everything is in the hands of Heaven, except for fear of Heaven.”Hashem is in charge of everything, except for a person’s level of yirat Shamayim. This is placed solely under one’s control. Our mission in this world is to subdue the Yetzer Hara and fear Hashem always. In this manner, we will walk the highroad leading to good and blessing.
