Decisiveness Undermines Indecision
A young man merited becoming engaged to a fine, Jewish girl. But after the engagement, doubts began to creep into his mind. Maybe this was not his Heavenly-intended? Maybe he acted too hastily and the whole thing was one big mistake? His hesitations ate away at him, until he could not go through with the marriage and broke the engagement.
After some time, he became engaged again. This time, too, indecision gnawed at him. Eventually, he broke this engagement, as well. The same happened with the third and the fourth engagements. Each time, he was beset by uncertainty, which ultimately prevailed.
When kallah number five appeared on the scene, the couple came to see me in order to be blessed before their marriage. “Are you certain, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that this is your intended?” I asked him.
As expected, the man began having qualms, once again. I sincerely wished to help him and therefore asked him to leave the room for a few moments. After speaking with his kallah a bit, I realized that she was a real eishet chayil, a true Jewish daughter, who would make an excellent wife and help him build a solid Torah home. I decided that, this time, I was the one who would make the decision. This way, he would never have feelings of regret.
I asked the girl to leave the room while I spoke with the young man. “If you break this engagement, you will forfeit your true intended, and forego the opportunity of a lifetime, for after this one, you will never manage to build a Jewish home. This girl is your intended partner from Shamayim. There is no need to look elsewhere for your soul-mate.”
The young man heard my words and accepted them wholeheartedly. He married this wonderful young lady and, Baruch Hashem, lives a beautiful life with her.
