A Momentous Match
After I had reached the age of shidduchim, I discovered that I was having difficulty finding my partner in life. I was offered numerous suggestions, but none was appropriate. I turned to my father, asking him for guidance navigating the rocky road toward my future home. With his far-reaching vision, Father assured me that I had nothing to worry about. My predestined partner would arrive when the time was right. Father’s words encouraged me, and I continued everyday life without feeling pressure.
Once, when I was visiting Paris, a woman and her daughter approached me. The girl’s life was in danger, the mother said, and asked that I bless her and pray for her recovery. “Who am I that I should bless you?” I asked, incredulously. “Why don’t you visit my father, in Eretz Yisrael? He is capable of blessing you.” I was yet young. What effect did my prayers have in comparison with the holy tefillot of my father? On the other hand, the woman had approached me for a favor. Fulfilling her request would be an act of chessed. What could it hurt if I acceded to her request? I therefore gave them a blessing from the depths of my heart, stating that the merit of my fathers should stand by this girl for a speedy recovery.
A short while later, the girl recovered completely, and her family hosted a seudat hodayah. They invited me to attend. When I arrived at their home in Lyon, I was ushered into a side room. As I sat there, wondering what this was all about, a couple entered, asking for my blessing for children.
I was in a state of shock. It gradually dawned on me that the family had arranged for me to see the public and dispense berachot for all who came. Glancing outside the room, I was confounded at the sight of a long line of people patiently waiting their turn. I had no desire other than to lift my legs and flee. In all my life, I had never considered acting as a rabbi and influencing people. Did I ever dream of sitting across from people, listening to their stories and offering them advice? Who was I, after all? Merely a young man. I didn’t even have a beard, because I constantly harbored thoughts of entering the business world. I was far from the conventional Rav. Moreover, I wasn’t yet married. What were all these people doing here??
With no other recourse, I remained in the room. Against my will, I blessed the people, one by one, each according to his needs. Among those who entered were a young man and woman. I thought they were an engaged couple who came to visit me before their wedding day. I asked if they wanted a berachah before their marriage. They hurriedly replied that they were not engaged; they were brother and sister, each coming to ask for a blessing to find his soul-mate soon. I blessed them wholeheartedly. I suggested that the girl meet with a young man, whose name happened to enter my mind just then. Later, I tried to arrange a shidduch between them, but it wasn’t meant to be.
Time passed. I traveled to Eretz Yisrael to attend my brother’s wedding. While there, I met the family of this young man and woman. They greeted me warmly. Mother noticed our interaction, and, realizing that we were previously acquainted, she invited the family to the Shabbat Chatan, the Shabbat after the wedding which is hosted by the groom’s family. When I asked her why she felt compelled to invite them, she merely replied, “Father told me that if I come across dignified-looking people, I should ask them to join us on Shabbat. I was just doing his bidding.”
“What gives you the impression that these are dignified people?” I pressed her. But Mother remained silent.
Shabbat spread her wings over the Holy Land. During the morning seudah, Father suddenly stood up from his place and left the room. He returned with a ring and a set of bracelets. He turned to the mother of the girl whom I had met earlier, and told her, “Your daughter is the intended one for my son.”
To say we were shell-shocked is an understatement. Our jaws dropped in astonishment at Father’s forthrightness. I myself could not find my tongue for a good while. When I finally did, I asked Father what this was all about. All he would say by way of explanation was, “I was shown in a dream that this is your true intended. The girl shares a neshamah with you.” And that was how my match was made.
After two months, I stood with my bride under the chuppah, and we were married according to Jewish custom. I didn’t really know much about her family, as they lived abroad. But I knew with all certainty that this was my Divinely-ordained soul-mate.
Before I had become engaged, I had spent time in Ashdod together with my good friend, Harav, the tzaddik, Rabbi Refael Abuchatzeira, shlita, son of Rabbi Meir, zy”a. We were both the same age, trekking the trail of shidduchim simultaneously. We agreed to visit the grave of Rabbeinu Chaim ben Atar, the Ohr Hachaim Hakadosh, zy”a, and pray there to find our intended life partners. We also considered visiting the home of the tzaddik, Rabbi Mordechai Sharabi, zy”a, and receive his blessing, but this did not work out because I was scheduled to fly to France at that time. Hashem arranged matters so that I find my intended shortly afterward.
Not long after my engagement, I received an invitation from Rabbi Refael Abuchatzeira, shlita, inviting me to his wedding. I checked the date, and, to both my dismay and great pleasure, discovered that I would not be able to attend. His wedding date was the exact same as my own! I sent Rabbi Refael my heartfelt wishes upon his marriage and explained that I would not participate in his wedding, for I had my own future home to erect, bisiyata di’Shemaya.
- Letter from the Tzaddik, HaGaon Rabbi Meir Abuchatzeira, zy”a, in honor of Moreinu’s marriage
This is the story of my match, a match made in Heaven, without any intermediaries.
